We're going to come right out and tell you: the theme of this week's e-newsletter is spring cleaning. You may not have noticed, but these things often have a theme; it's just not stated outright. Enough of that subtlety, however. Spring cleaning it is. According to Wikipedia (in an entry undoubtedly written by folks with at least as much authority on the subject as we have), in this part of the world spring cleaning is a custom that dates back to before there were vacuum cleaners and people took advantage of the relatively mild weather of spring to throw open their doors and windows to let the season's high winds blow the dust and dirt out. Apparently in the era before vacuum cleaners, wind was more prone to blow junk out of a house than into one, which seems more likely today (trading some dust for Little Debbie's wrappers and dead leaves doesn't seem like much of a deal, frankly). So beat your carpets, beat your dust bunnies, and then beat it to the Avenue, where clean is making a comeback.

Time to Shine
We think all children should be made to regularly view that classic TV commercial of a Native American crying as he watches litterbugs tossing trash out of car windows, heaving junk off boats, and dropping detritus on the ground. Melodramatic as it was, it was effective, and to this day we walk around with pockets full of straw wrappers and ticket stubs and ATM receipts awaiting an encounter with a trash can, since no way are we dropping anything on the ground and making old men cry. Not everyone is so careful, however, so every now and then it's worth taking some time to clean up after the folks who don't clean up after themselves (we've all had housemates like that). It's probably not actually your mess, but the litter that's blowing around the borough effectively belongs to — or at least reflects on — all of us, so someone has to deal with it. Next Saturday, April 17, has officially been declared Keep Lansdowne Beautiful Day, the one day a year when you can band together with other helpful citizens and tidy the joint up en masse. The focus is on the Central Business District, so the group will meet at Lansdowne and Baltimore Avenues at 9:30 am, and the work will wrap up by 1:00 pm. Brooms, trash bags, gloves, accordion-playing monkeys, and everything else you need will be provided; just grab some family and friends and show up to help. The rain date is Sunday, April 18, but let's hope it happens on Saturday because we're getting guests later that day . . .

Throwing Open the Doors
Boy, are we ever getting guests. They may not have the name recognition of, say, U2, but Straight No Chaser is getting bigger by the day, so one of the many perks of attending their April 17th concert at the Lansdowne Theater is that you'll be able to say you saw them when. Another big perk is that you'll get to see the Lansdowne Theater "when" too — in its days before renovation, when you need a little imagination to envision how grand the structure once was and how great it will one day be again. Volunteers have been working overtime to get the space shipshape (there's that cleanliness theme), and it hasn't looked this great in at least the 22 years since its last public outing (or "inning," as the case may more accurately be). Ticket holders will be able to show up early (doors at 2:00 pm; show at 3:00) and mingle in the lobby or in the seating area, purchase food and drinks inside the theater from the Regency Cafe and Cinema 16:9, and get info from groups like the Lansdowne Farmers Market, which will be there for local color. Most of the cheaper seats are gone, but you can still get $50 tickets at Cinema 16:9 and the premium seats from both 16:9 and the Regency. If you're hesitant to pay that much, remember that a big chunk of the ticket price goes to the Historic Lansdowne Theater Corporation's renovation fund so that some day you can come to a show and enjoy indoor plumbing. Also remember that if you miss this concert you'll probably end up regretting not being a part of this big afternoon in little Lansdowne's history, present, and future. (Insider tip: If you suffer from allergies, take a pill before you come. Despite heroic volunteer efforts, all the king's horses and all the king's men haven't been able to get all the king's dust out of the carpet yet.)

Redefining Clean
It's a little ironic, we realize, that we're following that recommendation to take your Benadryl before the Straight No Chaser concert with a plug for a movie that focuses on what life is like when you clear out some of the everyday chemicals from your home and body and go, so to speak, au naturale. But so be it; it's the simple order of events. With a special (very) limited engagement of one night only, Chemerical is to cleaning and personal hygiene products what Food, Inc. was to, well, food. If you're as concerned about what you put on your body as what you put in it, or just curious about what you expose yourself and the planet to every time you whip out a can of Febreeze to "clear" the air, you'll want to see this. Chemerical will be shown at 7:00 pm on April 18th at Cinema 16:9, 35 N. Lansdowne Avenue.

As Well as Brave and Reverent
The spring cleaning edition of Discover Lansdowne would not be complete without a nod to those young men whose very motto stresses their cleanliness. Yes, it's almost time for Boy Scout Troop 63's annual spring spaghetti dinner fundraiser, a dilly of a meal made from scratch and then served up by a host of merit-badged fellows who make up in enthusiasm and eagerness to please what they lack in actual waiter skills. Taking place at the First Presbyterian Church and costing $5 for kids under 12 and $8 for everyone else, the dinner of salad, spaghetti and meatballs, dessert, and a drink is delish and will be served from 4:00 to 7:00 pm on Saturday, April 24. It's a swell deal whether you eat it in or take it out.

Shop Upkeep
The Lansdowne Business Association is starting freshish with what seems to be a new name (didn't there used to be a "Professionals" in there?) and a nice new printed directory as well as an overhaul of their homepage to include a listing of businesses that are new, that recently joined the LBA, or both, plus some official name changes of LBA members. Go take a look and see what businesses are around that you may not have known about. Bet there are at least a couple. Take, for example, the sign language interpretation biz that's listed. Neat, huh?

Oh Yeah
One last thing. While it may not actually qualify as cleaning, we think we've at least improved this e-newsletter by enlarging the font so that residents older than 35 can read it without a 12 Monkeys-style magnifier. Thank you to the subscriber who made the request (sent a gentle complaint about the small font, really, but it had the same effect as a request), and feel free to let us know what you think. We always wanna.

Movies at Cinema 16:9
April 8 to 22, various dates and times
The Hurt Locker, Chemerical, Terrible Tuesday features
35 N. Lansdowne Avenue, Lansdowne

Angela Easterling at Concerts at the Beach House
Thursday, April 8, 7:30 pm; $15; BYOB
bob@bobbeach.net or 610-626-0012

Minas at Picanha Brazilian Grill
Friday, April 16, 7:00 pm; $22
6501 Castor Avenue, Philadelphia

Buskin & Batteau with guest Abi Tapia at the Lansdowne Folk Club
Thursday, April 22, 7:30 pm; $15 in advance, $18 at the door
Twentieth Century Club, 84 S. Lansdowne

26th Annual Darby-Cobbs Watershed-Wide Cleanup
Saturday, April 24, 9:00 am to 1:00 pm; Free
Hoffman Park, Marlyn Park, Pennock Terrace

All-You-Can-Eat Pancake Breakfast sponsored by Epiphany House
Saturday, May 1, 7:30 to 11:00 am
Adults $7, kids 5 to 17 $5, kids under 5 free
The Garden Church, Lansdowne and Stratford Avenues

Lansdowne Arts and Crafts Show
Saturday May 1, 9:00 am to 3:00 pm; Free
(Rain date: Sunday, May 2)
Lansdowne Avenue parking lot

Spring Yard Sale at The Garden Church
Saturday, May 1, 9:00 am to 3:00 pm; Free
Lansdowne and Stratford Avenues

The Dream of a Darby Creek Greenway Centennial Celebration
Saturday, May 1, 10:00 am to noon; Free
Twentieth Century Club, 84 S. Lansdowne

Red, White and Bluesy II Spring Social to benefit the Union Athletic Association
Saturday, May 1, 7:00 pm; $30
Call 610-284-0543 or 610-284-1433 for reservations
Twentieth Century Club, 84 S. Lansdowne

Townwide Yard Sale
Saturday, May 8
All around 'Downe Town

Annual Hoagie Sale by the Ladies Auxiliary of the Lansdowne Fire Company
Saturday, May 8, 9:00 am to 1:00 pm
Call 610-622-1995 or 610-485-4526 to order
Lansdowne Fire Company, N. Highland

Spring Tea at Secret Garden
Saturday, May 8; $10 for children 10 and under; $15 for others
Simpson Gardens, 84 N. Lansdowne
Reservations: 610-623-1514 (by May 3)

Second Annual St Philomena School Arts and Crafts Fair
Saturday, May 15, 10:00 am to 4:00 pm; Free
Marian Hall Gymnasium, 13 N. Highland

GLFL Community Plant Exchange
Saturday, May 15, 10:15 am; Free
Lansdowne Avenue parking lot

Mosaic Mirror Class to benefit GLFL
Saturday, May 22, 9:00 am to 1:00 pm; $30
Reservations: huberwalker@juno.com

Our Crochet Celebration at the Lansdowne Public Library
Saturday, May 29, 11:00 am to 3:00 pm; Free
33 S. Lansdowne Avenue
More info: mwazacrochet@comcast.net

Independence Day Parade and Fireworks sponsored by the Union Athletic Association
Saturday, July 3, starting at 9:00 am
Call 610-284-1433 to volunteer or suggest a theme

View the complete listing of local events